A fugitive people within a nation is tyranny.

Posts tagged ‘wife’

Man Forced to Pay Child Support for Kid Who Isn’t Even His

by Linda Fogarty

black-dadThere are a lot of good guys out there. Men who will step up to the plate and treat children who aren’t theirs as if they are their own. But, as one dad from North Carolina is learning after being told he has to pay child support for a child he didn’t father, some will take advantage of kindness.

Allow me to explain this somewhat complicated story. Randall Smith met, fell in love with, and married a woman shortly after he was hospitalized with lymphoma. Not long after their wedding, she came to him with some happy news—she was pregnant—hip-hip hurray, right?

Eh, not so fast. Smith had a vasectomy years before her announcement. We all know what that means, right?

Shocked beyond belief, we’re sure, Smith made an appointment with his urologist, who confirmed that he didn’t actually have sperm.

dollar bondageInstead of high-tailing it out of his marriage, he stuck around and showed he was more committed to his wife than most would have been if they were in this same position. He promised to raise the child as if he were his own, but says he also made it clear that if they ever split, her son would be her responsibility and he wouldn’t have to pay child support.

Seems fair, doesn’t it? After cheating on him, which I realize is only an assumption since he has yet to get a DNA test (say what?! I know), I would consider her pretty darn lucky to get a second chance with a man who was also willing to be a father figure to her son.

kangaroo courtI think you know where I’m going with this. They eventually broke up and the woman wants him to pay child support. Not only is Smith angry because he says he isn’t the father and they had an agreement (which, unfortunately, wasn’t in writing and signed by attorneys), but also because his injury left him disabled and $7,000 in arrears.

The biggest problem here is that Smith didn’t get a DNA test as soon as his wife’s son was born. He now has to scramble to get one in a certain amount of time for the court to even consider exonerating him from paying child support. What was he thinking?! Is he really that trusting that he assumed he could have faith in his wife’s word? Maybe he didn’t want to put the child through the trauma of a DNA test?

DNA-testThis is such a sad story. Any man who is kind enough to take care of a child who isn’t his deserves better than this—especially when there are many biological dads who aren’t acting responsibly and feel they are within their right to walk away when the duties of parenthood get in their way.

Do you think this man should be forced to pay child support?

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The Darkness of Societal Parental Alienation in Childcare

In our modern culture, parental alienation has become a scourge that has been largely supported by the government and family courts. This sociopathy has been considered “just a part of life,” which has crept into the entire scope of society. When it comes to childcare, it really is up to women to allow men into what has previously been their domain, especially as more and more women choose the marketplace to fulfill their lives. A great place to start is to get rid of exclusionary practices that cater exclusively to moms or that alienate parents and family from children in any way.

If you are connected with such a class, consider getting the name changed to one that is more welcoming, like “Toddler Time” or “Toddler and Me” — names that include not only dads but grandparents and other caregivers as well. It’s small changes like this that, over the long run, will help alter attitudes and perceptions about our roles as men and women in our society.

Rethinking Family Rights

a commentary by E. Manning, senior writer, family rights advocate and retired economist.

Times are tough for families in America. Stereotypes abound, especially toward men, popularly considered by many to be unfit to care for children. Men and a few women have become profound victims of the Welfare State frame-of-mind: victims of the State that claims justice for all.

The intense debate about “father’s rights” continues. Custody proceedings are often adversarial at best, accenting the worst in childish behavior on all fronts, even from judges. Cutting the rubbish, hurt feelings, immaturity and greed brings former mates for life into bare-knuckle fights over who is hurting the children. The fact of the matter is that the debate should be about “family rights.”

The systemic common attitude is that men are abusive, out of control and have little to offer. While men are demoted in rank and status even among their own children, they are expected to relinquish a third of their pay for the privilege of siring a child on the same money they made during the marriage in a dwindling economy. While the proliferation of rules abound, the reality is that there are no rules, only strife and abuse of the “law.” Husbands are often rooted out of the home by the wife with the expectation that life will somehow be better. That is rarely the case for either party. Vengeance is mine and high expectations rule the roost in the hope of controlling the system for personal advantage. This is the sole goal of many custodial parents.

Four years ago, a rash of violent killings erupted in Texas, committed by an unconnected group of hysterical men that had their lives and children mercilessly removed from them. One man killed his children. Another killed his wife, her new husband and a judge at the courthouse before turning the gun on himself. This is something that everyone, including the law, wants to forget. The law portends that men are fodder with little to say or do about their situation because the “law” is always right. Men don’t have rights except to support broken families.

Americans continue to be children of their own mistakes. It up to men and women to struggle and strain separately as they seek someone else to make the same mistakes with. They didn’t learn a thing from their first marriage. The finger of blame points odiously in all directions. No one and everyone is responsible at the same time in a bipolar rush for power that is encouraged by authority in the name of empowerment. Frustrated judges and ineffective law aren’t much better than bad behavior or murderous fits. There is no excuse for any of the evil that Americans actively support for the common good.

brave new world

brave new world

If family law is ever going to improve, the country has to stop demonizing men and women just because they are divorced. The government must get out of the business of breaking up the family in the name of children’s rights, a typical feminist ploy of the eighties. The old saying that it takes two to tango applies here. There is plenty of blame to go around when any relationship fails. Yet the court system claims to uphold the child without actually doing what it claims. The child suffers greatly in every way no matter how “good” or “capable” a single parent is. The reality is that the system encourages the blight to continue unabated as chaos continues to swallow the country. Parental alienation is rampant. No one is encouraged to get along. Life has become about the glory of the fight. The system has made it easy to bust up families in the name of convenience and political expedience, a system of social redistribution. The system has promoted selfish thinking that demotes the needs of everyone with the idea that times will somehow be better by selling-out.

~ E. Manning

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